25. Absinthe and Cliff, Part 3

Back to Absinthe's mother's anti-man-ism . . .

The second reason (which could probably be broken down into several sub-reasons, but let's keep things simple for now) had to do with anything women were required to do that seemed to originate solely from the minds of men (while one might be inclined to draw from biblical precedents, we'll stay a bit more contemporary here, having little patience for giving the Bible any more publicity than it has already received over the years).

To put it bluntly, Absinthe's mother resented anything that she had to wear that men did not and anything that men could wear that was considered inappropriate for women. To be even more specific, Absinthe's mother was particularly adamant about NOT wearing a bra--so strong was her objection that she proscribed the mere presence of the "garments of oppression" among her sisters, and she never bought one for nor allowed Absinthe to possess a bra of any kind, even a training bra, a term for an undergarment that Absinthe's mother considered derogatory and demeaning toward all women and girls--as if they had to be trained, like goats or sheep or dogs or the occasional cow. As she once said, "Women do NOT need to be trained by men."* Her sisters generally agreed, generally agreeing with everything Absinthe's mother proclaimed--especially if she was really worked up about it--though the freedom of going sans-bras did pose some unintended consequences for the more amply-endowed sisters while they performed some of their daily chores.

Paperboy lingering

One consequence involved simple practicality. Garden activities, for example, often became onerous and uncomfortable as the sisters bent over hacking into the hard soil, their top sides sliding to and fro, jiggling and jostling, flipping and flopping, oddly reminding one of freshly caught fish wrenching themselves about for their freedom on the bottom of a boat. On the whole, they seemed to be fighting against their own bodies as much as they were the soil and the weeds and the posts that needed pounding, and all the rest. Ironically, bras may well have offered a bit of control and support and stability and even improved balance through these sweaty labors--which leads to a related issue. Sweating through their clothes created a certain translucence that, when back or side lit by the late afternoon sun, introduced a level of intrigue and titillation that drew like curious meerkats  the neighboring male farmers and gardeners. Even the paperboy took his time digging out the afternoon edition from his bag, casting side-long glances toward the women and feeling a little tingly and not quite understanding why but understanding that he enjoyed it until Absinthe's mother yelled, "Get on your way now, future-man! You're not welcome here!" The men, on the other hand, were far more subtle, often using binoculars from their outhouse windows.

How Absinthe plays into the previous discussion may soon be shown--perhaps in the next post.


*Editor's Note: Absinthe's mother's hostility toward men may be well founded for many reasons, but apparently the bra tirade was slightly off the mark. A woman actually receives credit for creating the first patented modern bra. Her name was Mary Phelps Jacob, a socialite who so objected to a lot of flopping around, and the such, that she took it upon herself to regain some chesticular order (editor's term). That she simply wished to exact revenge on women who smothered her self-esteem with the kinds of buxom curves and pendulous sensuality a somewhat blunted boyish body was less able to express is still open to debate.** A photograph of Phelps Jacob would probably solve that mystery--if only time permitted.

**Second Editor's Note (coincidentally on the first Editor's Note--how often does that happen?): Again, this is an issue for the 1960s. Boyish bodies on women--especially athletic women with chiseled biceps and six-pack abs--seem to be all the rage these days. Whether the trend lasts is anyone's guess. I'm hoping not--but I'm a male.